Assume that people have very good reasons for what they do, and that their culture actually makes sense. Try to find out those reasons. I am consistently surprised that cultures are so logical, even when I don't agree with some values.

Some people will give better answers than others and some answers might not seem to make much sense. It might be that they do make sense, but you haven't figured out why yet because you haven't gone far enough into the mindset. Some people give partial answers simply because they are speaking spontaneously and don't have time to think out their entire rationale. And of course there will always be people who simply don't know why or who deliberately give you a poor answer because they are shy or feel threatened.

There will probably be cultural aspects to asking good questions. For example, people of one culture differentiate sharply between the purpose (hidden agenda) of the question and what it is that is asked. They might not answer what you asked, but respond according to what they perceive your purpose to be. As another example, they might answer your question very well, but their idea of a reason might not seem logical to you. In that case you need to understand what kind of cultural logic they are using. If you dismiss the answer, you have dismissed an excellent learning opportunity.

Who should you ask? Some people will be recognized as knowing more than others. They might become embarrassed if you push them for an answer and they honestly don't know. It might be totally inappropriate to ask a person of the opposite sex, or of particular age groups.

How much depends on who you think they are? They might give better answers when they know you better and trust you more. If they think you are a genuine friend who want to learn, they will likely give you an honest answer. But if you say that you are writing a graduate dissertation, they can feel threatened by your role and very pressured to provide a very clever answer. They might decline, especially if they have much lesser formal education or they can manufacture a fictitious answer.

It might be that you are poorly understood or unknowingly asked an offensive question. Be aware that many people might be too polite to tell you, and you will only find out what happened after a considerable people of time.

Some questions can also frustrate people if they sound like:

• Are you tall or short? (Actually, I'm about medium.)
• Have you stopped beating your wife? (Whether you answer yes or no, it still means that you have been beating you wife.)
• How much is a one-dollar candy? (It obviously costs a dollar, so is this a trick question? It seems like you're fishing for another answer.)
• "Which color raw squid do you prefer to eat: blue or purple?" (I've never eaten raw squid, I don't want to, I don't know anything about squid colors, and I certainly have no preference for one over the other.)
• In your opinion, what were the main developments in seventeenth century Italian mathematics? (What am I supposed to know about that?)

BIG Hint Keep a diary of your questions and the answers your were given, your observations, and things to which you had to adjust.

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